STANDARDIZED BONEHEAD REPLY FORM (c) copyright 1999 by someone else. (check all boxes that apply) Dear: [ ] Clueless Newbie [ ] Lamer [ ] Flamer [ ] Loser [ ] Spammer [ ] Troller [ ] "Me too" er [ ] Pervert [ ] Geek [ ] Freak [ ] Nerd [ ] Elvis [ ] Racist [ ] Fed [ ] Freak [ ] Fundamentalist [ ] Satanist [ ] Homeopath [ ] Unbearably self-righteous person I took exception to your recent: [ ] Email [ ] Post to XXXX (newsgroup) It was (check all that apply): [ ] Lame [ ] Stupid [ ] Abusive [ ] Clueless [ ] Idiotic [ ] Brain-damaged [ ] Imbecilic [ ] Arrogant [ ] Malevolent [ ] Contemptible [ ] Libelous [ ] Ignorant [ ] Fundamentalist [ ] Boring [ ] Dim [ ] Cowardly [ ] Deceitful [ ] Demented [ ] Self-righteous [ ] Crazy [ ] Weird [ ] Hypocritical [ ] Loathsome [ ] Satanic [ ] Despicable [ ] Belligerent [ ] Mind-numbing [ ] Maladroit [ ] Much longer than any worthwhile thought of which you may be capable. Your attention is drawn to the fact that: [ ] You posted what should have been emailed [ ] You obviously don't know how to read your newsgroups line [ ] You are trying to make money on a non-commercial newsgroup [ ] You self-righteously impose your religious beliefs on others [ ] You self-righteously impose your racial beliefs on others [ ] You posted a binary in a non-binaries group [ ] You don't know which group to post in [ ] You posted something totally uninteresting [ ] You crossposted to *way* too many newsgroups [ ] I don't like your tone of voice [ ] What you posted has been done before. [ ] Not only that, it was also done better the last time. [ ] You quoted an *entire* post in your reply [ ] You started a long, stupid thread [ ] You continued spreading a long stupid thread [ ] Your post is absurdly off topic for where you posted it [ ] You posted a followup to crossposted robot-generated spam [ ] You posted a "test" in a discussion group rather than in alt.test [ ] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message [ ] You posted low-IQ flamebait [ ] You posted a blatantly obvious troll [ ] You followed up to a blatantly obvious troll [ ] You said "me too" to something [ ] You make no sense [ ] Your sig/alias is dreadful [ ] You must have spent your life in a skinner box to be this clueless. [ ] You posted a phone-sex ad [ ] You posted a stupid pyramid money making scheme [ ] You claimed a pyramid-scheme/chain letter for money was legal [ ] Your margin settings (or lack of) make your post unreadable. Each line just goes on and on, not stopping at 75 characters, making it hard to read. [ ] You posted in ELitE CaPitALs to look k0OwL [ ] You posted a message in ALL CAPS, and you don't even own a TRS-80 [ ] Your post was FULL of RANDOM CAPS for NO APPARENT REASON [ ] You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of this newsgroup. [ ] You have greatly misunderstood the purpose of the Internet. [ ] You are a loser. [ ] This has been pointed out to you before. [ ] You didn't do anything specific, but appear to be so generally worthless that you are being flamed on general principles. It is recommended that you: [ ] Get a clue [ ] Get a life [ ] Go away [ ] Grow up [ ] Never post again [ ] Read every newsgroup you posted to for a week [ ] stop reading Usenet news and get a life [ ] stop sending Email and get a life [ ] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it [ ] Have your medication adjusted [ ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor [ ] find a volcano and throw yourself in [ ] get a gun and shoot yourself [ ] Actually post something relevant [ ] Read the FAQ [ ] stick to FidoNet and come back when you've grown up [ ] Apologize to everybody in this newsgroup [ ] consume excrement [ ] consume excrement and thus expire [ ] Post your tests to alt.test/misc.test [ ] Put your home phone number in your ads from now on [ ] Refrain from posting until you have a vague idea what you're doing In Closing, I'd Like to Say: [ ] You need to seek psychiatric help [ ] Take your gibberish somewhere else [ ] *plonk* [ ] Learn how to post or get off the usenet [ ] Most of the above [ ] All of the above [ ] Some of the above, not including All of the above [ ] You are so clueless that I didn't even bother filling in this form.